Belinda wiley
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5/1/2023

Are the female orgasm and the clitoris still mysteries?

Are the female orgasm and the clitoris still mysteries?

The mysterious clitoris has a beautiful part to play when women are wondering if something is wrong with them because they cannot achieve an orgasm with their partner during penetrative sex.

There is also this huge lack of education about exactly how both men’s and women’s sexual anatomy works - this I believe is where the mystery may lie!

I know most humans understand how the male anatomy works - basically because it is visible and we have all had some form of sex ed about penis in vagina equals you know what. Plus there has been much more research done on men's delicate sexual parts because honestly I think mostly men have been in the medical research field.

But does everyone understand women’s anatomy and where the clitoris is located? I say no not really because they are hidden. In fact I know many women haven't even sighted their vulvas let alone their clitoris! The vulva is the outer part of the female genitals. The vulva includes the opening of the vagina (sometimes called the vestibule), the labia majora (outer lips), the labia minora (inner lips) and the clitoris. So around the vagina are two sets of skin folds. Of course yes they can be felt but not easily seen without the use of a mirror.

Good news the first anatomical research on on the clitoris was in Melbourne in 1998 by urologist Professor Helen O’Connell. Then in 2005 Professor O’Connell examined it under MRI.   

She discovered it was not just a small nub of erectile tissue, it was an otherworldly shape, with the nerve-rich glans that extended beneath the pubic bone and wrapped around the vaginal opening, with bulbs that become engorged when aroused.  It looked like an orchid she said.  “It was beautiful”.

This lets us know that that whole area, not just the clitoris, is full of erectile tissue that can feel immense  pleasure when touched or stroked or have pressure put on them.

I tell women that sometimes the length of the vagina and the length of the penis can be the answer to why you are not achieving what you desire

Also so many humans do not realise how many other ways there are to achieve an orgasm or just plain overwhelming pleasure.

The clitoris is purely for sexual pleasure so this is more often than not the go to place where, with stimulation a woman can orgasm.

To try and coordinate the stimulating of the clitoris at the same time as a penis being inside the vagina is not always achievable for every woman.

I will say it now and again and again - there is nothing wrong here.   This is wonderful information.

This is when sex can become full of compassionate curiosity and play as you find new ways to both feel ecstatic pleasure.     

Who or what told you have to climax together and only in the missionary position?

I say find your own ways of having sexual pleasure together.   Play together!   Experiment together!

Be honest with each other!    What do you know what turns you on?   What don’t you?

What would you like to try?   What would you not like to try?

CURIOSITY and PLAYFULNESS are the key to orgasmic pleasure - and you can make up your own rules and ways of enjoying your body and stop following what you thought you were meant to do!

Hey if some old ways are working for you that is great!

But if you need some new ways to try go PLAY!!

Want my 2 fave practices for more turn-on in your relationship? 🔥

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